3. Baby scans – Creatures of the Deep

On this whole baby creating ‘journey’ we’ve been lucky enough have to have a multitude of baby scans. Having twins seems to give you a free pass to scan central – those suckers need to be looked at all the time!

Both our parents have exclaimed how lucky we are to have all these scans, to be able to follow the growth of our unborn girls.

In my day…

When I had my baby…

(Fill in the blanks of how medical equipment of the 60s and 70s was rudimentary at best.)

This is all very well but I actually want to give some feedback on this. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

Our first few ultrasounds were great – the usual lovely feelings of shock, excitement, interest and love overwhelmed us. Then came the 3D scan. Shock. Sit down. Deep breath.

I’ve decided these 3D scans, are just, well, damn right freaky. From the depths of Susan’s uterus appears these creatures of the deep. Murky brown blobs with facial features and freakishly big heads.

Am I meant to still have those feelings of love? Because it actually scared the sh*t out of me.

All around me, soon to be mums wave the scans around with pride and joy – ‘Isn’t he gorgeous?’ ‘Look how cute her nose is!’

Err no. And stop waving those scans around me like dirty tissues.

Let’s discuss this in further detail, take ET (our favourite blanketed extra terrestrial) and Jabba the Hutt (Star Wars glamour boy). Notice their fine delicate features? Yes?



Now please see a close up of my twins:





It’s uncanny! All they need is a space ship and a laser gun and they are two steps away from being guardians of the galaxy.

Great, we’re having aliens. I WILL love them no matter what, and if all else fails we will have to do what Susan always says – Accessorise!

For all you potential parents out there, brace yourself. And may the force be with you.




2 thoughts on “3. Baby scans – Creatures of the Deep

  1. could kick butts over these terrible comments on our Grand Daughters to be!! But I know what you mean from the first scan with two black dots and your Dad said -‘oh great, 2 black babies, wonderful’ And he meant it – remember he loves….. small babies and calls them ‘neat little packages in their Babygros’!! I used to say you should be handed a list of instructions for the first 18 years, garbage it is for life!! Still a wonder to behold in our eyes and will be in yours too, just you wait and see!! Mumxx

  2. Guys you are so lucky to have at least something. In my day haha – jeepers I’ll be bloody 60 next month….I wasn’t even allowed in the room while the scan was carried out and to be given a copy……..you must be joking! I do remember the last birth like this morning, holding the new born, being left alone to savour the moment together and even being given tea and nurse my very sore hand. Who says girls cant squeeze harder than guys I can still see the finger nails embedded in the back of my hand ahhhhhhhhh

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